Archana2345

 I am overly sensitive and feel immobilized when I see people suffering. 
How can I become more detached?

Each person is unique in how we process situations outside. Some of us are strongly left brain oriented and some are right brain oriented. And some of us are more intuitive than others and can pick up the pain that others are feeling, which can be a mixed blessing. A good balance between reason and emotion is required to function effectively in life. An important aspect of spiritual maturity is achieving greater balance between mind and heart, where there is detachment but not indifference, love but not personal attachment.

                            See, your mind is subconsciously thinking disempowered thoughts when you see others in difficult situations, which results you feeling disempowered. If one is overly sensitive and emotional to the extent where she feels disempowered/immobilized by the suffering of others, it helps to consciously operate more from the intellect (rationality/logic) and less from emotion. It is turning the emotional knob down a notch or two and rationalize your way to feel better. This will require some training until the mind adjusts to the new way of thinking/feeling. 

In the example stated, it will help to clearly differentiate empathy and sympathy/pity. Empathy is a positive quality of our being which helps us feel the suffering of others and serve others, while still remaining empowered ourselves. Sympathy on the other hand does not serve us well. It makes us weaker and we risk attracting the very lack that disempowers us. Thus, empathy helps, sympathy hurts.

To become detached and feel less sympathy, you may use this affirmation "I trust that life is unfolding perfectly as it should, even though my mind may not accept this at times. Each individual has to experience what they are experiencing in order to grow, and pain/struggle is part of the process. I am here to help others to the best of my abilities, however I choose not suffer and become disempowered by internalizing the suffering of others. In fact, I can help others effectively only only when I am strong within myself and detached from the outcome. I pray that that suffering of all being be removed, and that peace prevail in all minds."

[ Courtesy - Motivational speaker SudhirJi ]

 Pain becomes immaterial in the absence of suffering.Unrealized pain becomes suffering.There is no suffering if you can let go.Happiness is an inside job.Accept what you can’t change, change what you can; and learn the difference

Who is who? From where have you and others come? Let go off the intellectualized knowledge. This world is no more real than a dream and just as temporary.
Avoid pain because it doesn't feel good.Avoid anything that don't make you FEEL GOOD.Buddha never said that there was an end to pain.He Just said abt 'an end to suffering'

What you do for yourself- any gesture of kindness, any gesture of gentleness, any gesture of honesty and clear seeing toward yourself- will affect how you experience your world. In fact, it will transform how you experience the world. What you do for yourself, you’re doing for others and what you do for others, you’re doing for yourself.”

When we clearly realize that the source of disharmony and misery in the world is ignorance, we can open the door of wisdom and compassion. Then we are in a position to heal ourselves and others.

pain is inevitable suffering is optional

" Pain is what the world does to you, suffering is what you do to yourself "